My Goodness

I am not infatuated with the past. I'm not eager to learn about the failures of our society.  World news doesn't hold my interest.  Much like my youngest daughter's indifference to time,  my attitude towards politics and government is laissez faire.  However, if I am, as CNN host, Anderson Cooper, proclaims, "Keeping *ME* honest, " I find myself more and more concerned with the future of our world and how TODAY impacts it.

Last evening, we watched the "X-Men: Days of the Future Past" and the 80s classic, "Fatal Attraction." The themes of these movies seemed to resonate with this idea I've been having that we as a society have a God complex.  We want to be all knowing,  all powerful and all helpful to the ills of humanity.  We want an utopian world amidst poverty, racial and religious tensions, pandemic sickness and so on. We want to fix things and people and places. We want a guarantee on life, that outside of God's grace is promised to no one. We at times imagine ourselves as kinder, gentler, more merciful and loving than God. Certainly, more wise and capable than He, at solving the complex matters of our own hearts and minds. But, in reality, all we want is control.

The X-Men film forecast this idea of exceptional people being categorized as a threat because they could not be controlled.  And so, humans without the exceptional behavior or difference feared what they could not control. Fatal Attraction, a cult classic,  drew men and women into the bedroom with Dan (Micheal Douglas) and Alex (Glenn Close). Admist the passion of their adultery, pot flinging and rising steam, there was a theme that the director consistently marked out for us that screamed, "Pay Attention! You can't take fire into your bosom and not get burned.  Respect the fire because you can't control it."

This idea that we can control anything is a fable.  Preparedness doesn't keep disaster away. Education doesn't prevent cancer. Knowledge doesn't control evil. You cannot legislate morality. So what do we do? How do we change our behavior? How do we change the course of our society's inevitable doom?

There's a saying, "Confidence is silent. Insecurities are loud." For much of our society, our fears are like ornaments. We wear them with such pride. We adorn ourselves with fears we've adopted from our forefathers and ancestors. We parade them as marks of success, calling them high standards, preparedness and writs of passage.  I studied here.  I made my mark there. I prepared myself.  I can thus control yours and my own destinies. But the fear, is I am not prepared. I do not know anything.  I have no future. I will die and know nothing of all I accomplished in this place. I will leave this earth and nothing I have done in the here and now will have mattered. The fear of death and its irrevocable nothingness. That's the fear that must be addressed because without it we continue to mask away the truth. Death is inevitable. We are young and then we are old. Our attempts at prolonging life; or at least the appearance of prolonged life is evidenced in the increasingly successful cosmetic and pharmaceutical markets. Botox anyone? Viagra sir? Ah, the ever illusive fountain of youth.

Are we more kind than God? "Yes, He may want to destroy us all but we want to live," is how must people imagine Him. Truth is, we are not more kind than He. He cannot be outdone.  His mercies are NEW every morning,  while we hold on to past ( and imagined) offenses for years! We cannot help anyone without the help of Him. We cannot do greater deeds than He has done for us. We cannot see if He does not give us sight beyond where we are. Godly preparedness,  doesn't prepare for disaster. It readies itself for victory.  It sees the storm coming and sees it's end. It is unafraid.  It is  as Isaiah 30:15 declares, "In repentance and rest is your salvation, and in quietness and trust is your strength."

My goodness pales, like white doggie poo, in comparison to God's goodness.  He doesn't seek to control me, though He could. But He gives me the freedom and the liberty to walk on my own, to feel,  taste, touch and smell the world around me; and His only requirement is that I allow Him to be God to me. If I don't it doesn't change His God status or nature, He is still God. But if I accept, it changes my everything. My whole world becomes an endless chain of events that leads to eternal life. Wow.  Big wow!

I am fearless about my future not because I'm blind to it, on the contrary I see through it. This morning as I prayed, I was able to reflect on where I had been.  How deep my sorrow was and how great a divide my past is from my present.  I praised God for His mercy, Unfailing Love and grace towards me. And I thanked Him for my future. By God's grace, I am not bound by fear. I see beyond. My concern lies with those who are so full of fears that they cannot see past today. Worry grabs hold of them in the night, strangling them until the sun rises again. My commitment to God today, is to tell you how deeply loved you are. It doesnt matter what you did or who you are. You are loved with a perfect and unconditional love. You can live an abundantly full life that last eternally through the person of Jesus Christ. your relationship with the living God isn't about Him controlling you but you having control over YOU. We project so much of our desire to control on external matters but rarely have control over our own internal workings.  Few of us, have mastered control of our thoughts, actions and speech. As the Apostle Paul would agree, What we will to do we do not do; and what we will not to do, is what we do with regularity. It is God's desire to empower us by His grace to do those things that we desire to do that please Him, not because it will make Him love us more but because OUR lives will be all the better for it. I believe God wants us to have a little heaven on earth and to share that piece (and peace) of heaven that we enjoy everywhere that we go. My goodness isn't to point people to me. That's control.  My goodness is to point people to heaven. That's liberty! I pray your strength and divine healing.  Be at peace, knowing that God is good.  And He is a faithful rewarder of ALL who put their trust in Him. Amen. Fearless Nation!  Let's go!

L-O-V-E is the Movement

Gosh, I have wanted to write on other things: relationships, my book, “The Lady’s Rage” and some of the everyday challenges and triumphs I have had recently; but I keep being drawn back to the same theme of forgiveness. Let’s just say that I don’t see myself as one who harbors ill feelings. I don’t hold grudges. I can’t think of anyone that I am mad at. However, there are people that occasionally offend me. Offenses come. We are all in this world and we are all so very different; and at times people will say or do things that are inappropriate, demeaning and all together offensive to us. And that is not to say we are right and they are wrong; but that because of the vast differences between people it is easy sometimes to offend or to do or say something that rubs another person the wrong way.

My greatest offenses come at the expense of my call…not to perfection but to righteousness. I am offended by things, conversations and actions that are clearly meant to create havoc. I like peace. I like peaceable situations. I like peaceable people. I am very comfortable in quiet environments where I can hear a bird chirp, the wind blowing, the trees rustling and the sound of my own thoughts; because it makes it easier for me to hear the voice of my Father. Chaos, ruckus and arguing are not things I enjoy. And on the occasions, that I am forced to be subject to chaos, argument and havoc I am innately bothered. I want to make peace. Unfortunately, not everyone is like me. Some people thrive off of drama. The more the merrier. And as much as I would like to make the world a happier and more peaceful place, it clearer is not. The challenge is this when the offense strikes you at your very core. Can you forgive? Can you let it go? As I said, I am not a person who harbors things. I believe that people can change. What you did or said in a moment may not be where you are forever. I know there are things I have said, things I have done in a period of my life that are the complete opposite of who I am today. My past literally contradicts my present and my present will inevitably contradict my future. I am constantly changing, moving and growing.

In fact, I had a conversation with my mom Sunday and I was talking to her about movement. I was marveling at the sound of my voice, as I was talking, and how it is that everything in my body is in constant movement. Even as I sat in the living room talking to her, blood was moving in my body. Cells and neutrons (I think), words and terminology for my biology are at movement even as I type these words. Nerves are reacting and ping ponging messages to my brain that are helping me formulate my thoughts. Movement. I was telling my mom, that God is constantly moving on our behalves. We may not see it, we may not know it but He is moving. Things are reacting and ping ponging off of the words that we speak. Whatever is abundantly present in us will emanate from us in the words that we speak. The words that we speak are the very elements that move us, change us, deliver us and grow us.

I say that because we must always be moving in love. Love is the movement. For out of love grows forgiveness. Forgiveness, if you are a believer is a lifestyle. It should be an absolute. If not, we will be stuck and grow stale and bitter with time. If I am, as a child of God, offended at the world, its system of doing things, the ignorant and ill informed opinions of people who are without knowledge of the true and living God, than I too am perpetuating the same ill advised and demented behavior that is offensive to me. I must forgive everyone. EVERYONE. Jesus lamented, “Father forgive them they don’t know what they are doing.” We all are like children. And the greatest evidence of my right standing, sonship, with the Father, My God, my creator is not in my perfection but in the acknowledgement, receipt and dispensation of His great and unfailing love. Forgiveness comes at a price. It cost your humility. It cost you saying, what you did to me, said about me is not going to stop me from loving you. Forgiveness prepares to give before the offense occurs and gives without reluctance. I challenge you today, as I challenge myself, FORGIVE EVERYONE.

In His Love, Natrietia